No, seriously, you’re awesome.

I’ve seen several clients recently who have been going through rough times in their lives.  They are able to speak openly and vulnerably about their struggles, and they are doing their best to move forward.  For many of them, as I touch the energy near their ears, the thought, “Needs more kind words,” pops into my head.  When I relay this to the client, there are often tears and the realization of truth.  As I reflect on those words, I realize I could use more kind words myself, and thought you probably could, too.  So let me start by saying that each of us is beautiful.  Each of us is uniquely amazing.  Each of us has something important to share with others.  Each of us has unlimited potential.


Most of us find it relatively easy to tell our friends and loved ones how special they are, how they deserve the best, and how much they are loved.  We comfort others when they are down, and may even find we “care too much,” or “love too deeply.”  But how is it possible to care too much or love too deeply??  Aren’t these the things we strive to do??  Why do we strive to care and love if it makes us feel drained or hurts us?  The truth is, caring and loving become draining when we don’t start with ourselves.


How many times a day do you criticize yourself?  I bet it’s more than you think.   When I really paid attention, I was floored by how many times a day I used negative self-talk.  Everything from”My hair looks ridiculous,” to “I hate that I can’t make this thing work,” to “I’ll never be as good as she is.”  These kinds of thoughts are toxic.  The more we speak poorly to ourselves, the more we expect and allow others to treat us poorly.  When we believe we are less, we accept less.  We expect it, because we’ve managed to convince ourselves it’s true.

Truth can be a tricky thing.  If we tell ourselves something enough times, we start to believe it.  You may have heard, “Believing is Being,” but beliefs aren’t always true.  If I believe the world is flat, I will act as though the world is flat.  It will be flat, as far as I know.  I will limit my travel routes and plan accordingly.  However, in TRUTH, the world is round, which means I just restricted my freedom and exploration for a false belief.  Ouch.  The same thing happens in your head.  If you continually tell yourself you’re not good enough, you’ll never be capable, or you’ll never reach your goals, you’ll start to believe it.  You’ll limit yourself so that you fulfill those prophecies and live within their confines.


Start telling yourself you’re a powerful, beautiful soul with unlimited potential.  That’s the truth.  It’s exactly what each of us are, and it’s about time we start to recognize it.  Be pleasantly surprised each day by the wonderful things you can accomplish.  Find the good inside you.  See where you can remove some negative self-talk and add more kind words.  The more you embody the kindness you give yourself, the more you will find you are able to share with others.  When you are already overflowing with kindness from within, you won’t need to seek it from outside of yourself as much.  You’ll find more love and kindness following you, and you’ll begin to feel that you care and love exactly enough.


Just because I am saying we need to be kinder to ourselves, that does not mean I am saying we should falsely inflate our egos.  “I look beautiful,” is a completely different sentiment from “I am the most beautiful woman I know.”  Leave comparisons out of your self-talk.  Your self doesn’t care if you are better or worse than someone else.  It only knows you.  (Stop trying to impress your self – you always know when you’re not being genuine.)  The same goes for how you listen to others.  If someone tells you you are amazing, believe it.  If someone tells you you are “more amazing than…” take it with a grain of salt.  No one is better or worse.  We all are.  Each person is unique, and we are all unique for a reason.  Individuality is something our souls understand, but our egos resist.  We want to be accepted/liked/loved by others so much, that we forget we need to accept/like/love ourselves in order for that to happen.  We aren’t perfect.  We never will be, so one of these days, maybe we’ll stop trying.  We should be aiming to be as incredible as our potential can reach.  Some days we will fall short of that potential, and others we will be in perfect alignment with our highest goals.  That’s how life goes for all of us.  Trying to make things “perfect” only sets us up for disappointment.  We need to stop worrying about how we measure up, and just see where we are.  Once we start comparing and measuring, we start exaggerating and manipulating.  When we see the truth in ourselves, it is easier to find love, compassion, and kindness.

Share your positive self-talk in the comments below!


No Comments